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Monday, November 30, 2009

More "Britiocy" from Across the Pond

Here's the latest example:
    Parents who teach their own children at home must undergo criminal records checks, say Government education inspectors.

    The estimated 40,000 parents who choose not to send their children to school should be vetted, says Ofsted [Office for Standards in Education]. It said that parents whose records throw up suspicions should be barred from teaching their own children.

With all the idiotic stories coming out of Great(?) Britain these days, I think the word "britiocy" should officially be added to our vocabulary.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

"As God As My Witness, I Thought Turkeys Could Fly"

Here's the classic WKRP episode "Turkeys Away."



Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Golfing = Littering

What was once a gentleman's sport is now considered an environmental hazard. From CNN:
    Research teams at the Danish Golf Union have discovered it takes between 100 to 1,000 years for a golf ball to decompose naturally. A startling fact when it is also estimated 300 million balls are lost or discarded in the United States alone, every year. It seems the simple plastic golf ball is increasingly becoming a major litter problem. ...

    ... Local government ministers in Scotland have also complained about the level of golf ball littering. UK lawmaker Patrick Harvie told CNN: "From the moon to the bottom of Loch Ness, golf balls are humanity's signature litter in the most inaccessible locations."

Of course, anyone who has watched Seinfeld knows the damage golf balls can do to the environment:

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

"Awesome" Mayoral Candidate

Sometimes I miss living in Minneapolis. Here on the east side of the river we just don't get "awesome" mayoral candidates like Joey Lombard:
    Joey, like most people, started life as a baby and he only got bigger from there. Growing up on the Northside, Joey attended his neighborhood schools. It was there that the learned to read and write, a skill which is all too useful for many politicians. Upon acquiring this literacy, Joey continued his academic career in the Minneapolis Public School system. Although Joey regrettably transferred to out-of-city schools for several years, he ultimately returned and graduated sub cum laude from Patrick Henry High School in 2005.

    Since that time, Joey has led a life of continued awesomeness. Having enlisted and served in both the U.S. Air Force, and the U.S. Army, Joey understands what it takes to be great. This employment dedication led him to a high-end job in Downtown Minneapolis where he regularly spoke with Minneapolitans of all backgrounds and learned what they wanted and worked to deliver such.

    Joey, when not practicing his piano or guitar, spends much of his time in Minneapolis, often riding public transit and shopping at local, small businesses. Everyday, Joey continues to discuss politics with concerned citizens, furthering his knowledge of and commitment to the improvement of his city.

Perhaps the most appealing aspect of his campaign was his promise to improve the city by "putting his years of playing Sim City to use."

Did I mention that Joey "is awesome"? No, really. It even said so on the ballot:

Too bad he didn't win. He certainly was infinitely more qualified than the bloated bureaucrats who have held the office up until now.